Stupid on my Forehead

So, T, one of my best friends, and former roommate (the only one who stayed at school after I lived with her), teaches fourth grade at a Catholic grade school outside Chicago. After today, I think it might have been easier to teach little kids. At least I'm bigger than they are, no one one mistakes me for one of my students.

I spent most the weekend grading papers. I followed the rubric, only adding on one additional criteria. If you failed to write your name on your lab report under the line which read, "by" and instead made the report by an individual named "I L V Chem", I took off five points for not knowing your own name. Maybe this was a bit harsh, but my students are freshman in college. I'd expect T's kids to know their names, and put them on their papers under the "by" line. Based on the deduction system, I was VERY generous. Most of my students realized how generous I was after I handed back their papers. But, one girl spent the whole lab sulking. She claimed that since it was her first lab report, and she had spent three whole hours writing it, and she didn't know any better, and everyone else did it, and her name was on the report somewhere else, she  shouldn't loose credit. She took it to my boss. I had to answer to him that I thought I was being fair, especially considering how harshly I could have graded.

I feel like I'm dealing with children.

I had another two try to pass cheating. I know teachers aren't supposed to have favorite students, but these two are some of mine. They're smart, funny, and pains in the asses. They also produced almost identical lab reports. Like, lay them side by side and grade them worded very closely simillar. I had to wonder, was STUPID printed in big red letters on my forehead? Did they honestly think they could pass off cheating? So, in my second official act as TA, I got to take them aside and lecture them about cheating and how I saved their sorry asses. This was, of course, after I made one climb off the bench top...

So, I have 50 more reports to grade, two review sessions to run (in addition to my normal office hours), and two tests next week, plus normal homework and research. Someone at our orientation described grad school as temporary insanity. I'm begining to think the madness has only just begun.